Rescuing aloneness from loneliness!

Loneliness is a complex and usually unpleasant experience
Loneliness often includes anxious feelings Sometimes is caused by a lack of connection or communication with other people
But the strangest thing is that loneliness can be felt even when surrounded by other people!
Loneliness is a negative presence which can dominate a person’s life, appear as an undercurrent without taking over total control or simply be an overwhelming experience from time to time. Loneliness suggests that a person is deficient, or that life is unfair or that people are not worth getting to know as well as many other depressing messages.

It is important to understand the difference between loneliness and aloneness.
Aloneness is valued as a time when one may work, think or rest without being disturbed, or for the sake of desirable privacy.

It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.

I find it wholesome to be alone the greater part of the time. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude
Henry David ThoreauWalden; or, Life in the Woods (1854)

In narrative counselling, we might explore the difference between loneliness and aloneness. We might research how aloneness gets corrupted by loneliness. We might create a plan of rescuing aloneness from the diabolical schemes of loneliness

A first step might be to begin an experience of aloneness by thinking of my favourite parts of my life! What makes me enjoy being alive and close my eyes for a minute to imagine those experiences, something that can only happen when I am alone!

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